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New video is less than half the length of the previous one but more in depth, including the history of the truck and project details. ALSO: Rewards have been completely revamped. I would really appreciate any and all feedback, especially from anyone with extensive crowdfunding experience. We'll be in preview mode until the feedback consensus says we're ready. Please also feel free to hit me with any questions you may have. Thank you!

I went to click on your video, and then I stopped, almost as soon as I started. Your choice of lettering caught my eye - in a bad way.

Red lettering with yellow outline and white lettering with red outline on a black background gives your video a poor quality appearance right out of the gate. Why do you have the black background?

Also, you might want to change the name of the project. Calling it John's Old Truck makes it seem like it's about you. You want people to buy in to the restoration of the truck, right? Or are you wanting people to focus upon the John part? If you don't include John in the title, then I think that people will be less likely to latch onto the YOU aspect of this project. Make it about the TRUCK.

Thanks, Charles. It is about the truck. John is just the guy who owns it. And "JohnsOldTruck" has been my username on multiple social media platforms for quite a while now. Seems to me it would be counterproductive to change the theme in mid stream, especially when I'm trying to establish that there's a living, breathing human behind this project, with memories, feelings and emotions just like everyone else. I figured it would be easier for viewers to make a connection that way.

Thanks for the feedback on the opening graphics. Over time they will probably go through multiple transformations. That said, they comprise only six seconds of the video. What do you think of the other 3 minutes and 40 seconds? How about the overall Kickstarter preview, with all the updated info and rewards? Changing graphics is easy. I'd like to know your thoughts on the more difficult stuff. Thanks again...

JohnsOldTruck wrote:Thanks for the feedback on the opening graphics. Over time they will probably go through multiple transformations. That said, they comprise only six seconds of the video. What do you think of the other 3 minutes and 40 seconds?

I think that this video lost me within the first few seconds. I didn't like what I was seeing, and I clicked it off. Understand, you are going to lose people, with that text, as is. People online frequently will click a website off, if it loses their attention. They won't hesitate to do so.

The video needs to get people's attention - and retain their attention. People aren't going to assume that the rest is worth watching, if you've lose their interest almost as soon as the video starts playing, which is what the case was, with me.

And, I had the advantage of already knowing what your project was about. Thus, I wasn't disinterested in your project, initially. I wasn't disinterested, when I clicked on the new video.

So even though you had the advantage of knowing what my project is about, you couldn't look past six seconds of weak opening graphics (sorry, I'm not a professional filmmaker) to see how the project has been updated since our previous exchange? What I'm looking for is some constructive feedback on the overall presentation, including not just the video but also the completely revamped preview page text and rewards. I want to know how I can make the whole thing better. Aside from the small part of one aspect of the presentation that you have made quite clear you don't like, what do you think of the rest?

I'm sorry to say, but maybe take the time to follow the advice about the text. He's right. just make it block colour, straight up. the sound sounds great, but its hard to move past that onto other constructive criticisms when you havent taken action on this one. then we can all move past onto the next thing to improve. thats the biggest thing right now.

PS. They say you have to win the view over in the first 11 seconds. its like having a shitty cover on your book and telling people not to worry about that and just to read the contents. it doesnt matter what the contents are if people don't pick up the book....

Hi John,

I was critical about the first video, so great job on cutting that right back - I agree with everyone else about the graphics and whilst I appreciate that you are not a film maker, that first few seconds is critical, so I suggest you go to somewhere like fiverr.com, where someone will design you a logo for $5.

In addition, you mention your blog and facebook very early on - That's a big NO! You don't ever want to take people away from your page - you have gone to a great deal of trouble getting them there, why are you encouraging them to leave?

I have no real interest in cars & trucks and am not particularly swayed by 'tributes to family members', so I am afraid I switched off - but I hope my comments help.

Cheers,

Andy

I do appreciate the feedback and thank you all for taking the time. This is precisely why we're still in preview mode - so I can hear what people have to say and make changes accordingly. I really want the presentation to be the best in can be before we launch. I agree completely that the opening needs to change, and it will. As I continue my research and take in feedback from several different sources, I'm realizing that we also need a new project title. Working on that as well. The restoration will always be a tribute to Mom, but the more I read it the more I think it just doesn't fit in the title.

So several changes are on the way, and I will post updates here for more feedback. And as always, please feel free to ask me any questions that come up. Thank you all again for your time!

JohnsOldTruck wrote:So even though you had the advantage of knowing what my project is about, you couldn't look past six seconds of weak opening graphics (sorry, I'm not a professional filmmaker) to see how the project has been updated since our previous exchange?

Sure, I could have - but, I didn't want to. That you are not a professional filmmaker didn't factor into it, at all. I didn't suggest that you were a professional filmmaker, so it is a defense where no charge was lodged. In essence, a defense against nothing.

I've looked at your project more than once. I often do, with projects posted about here. I just don't always bother to comment.

JohnsOldTruck wrote:What I'm looking for is some constructive feedback on the overall presentation, including not just the video but also the completely revamped preview page text and rewards. I want to know how I can make the whole thing better. Aside from the small part of one aspect of the presentation that you have made quite clear you don't like, what do you think of the rest?

I think that the feedback that I provided was constructive feedback. Now, whether you - the project creator - chose to act on that feedback or not is separate question, altogether.

You look for constructive feedback. I look for people willing to act on feedback.

As to the rest of your new video, which I viewed in totality, this morning, I think that it is a visual hodgepodge with instances of poor video quality and a patchwork feel to it. I think that your choice of going for a voice over approach, rather than inject yourself into the video in video form - where your human depiction is on the screen doing the actual talking, is substantially less persuasive than it might otherwise potentially be. I think that you need to strike a better balance of audio versus video, in the actual video.

I think that your strongest potential selling point is the Route 66 idea. I think that vastly more people will connect with Route 66 than will ever connect with the John's Old Truck moniker. I think that your insistence on sticking with that moniker will effectively cut your project off at the knees.

But, it's your project to handicap, as you see fit.