by bntkids-studios » Thu Feb 17, 2022 8:45 pm
My dream is to create a new world of fantasy for others to enjoy.
I have always loved fantasy settings, including the world and creatures within them. Though I don't read many books, I still have a great, active imagination, and a thirst to show it off.
I have a deviantart account, a facebook account, etc. But I don't have very many followers. I hope that this kickstarter campaign will be a huge success, provided that I am able to find the tools and resources, as well as build the connections needed to make my dream a reality.
Honestly, folks, if I could, I would simply go there, to the real live world in my head. But that's not ever going to happen, my fantasy world is just a fantasy.
And lately, a lot of people have been saying negative things about my dream, like "You're out of luck" or "You're out of your league."
I've heard of success stories, from rags to riches, but I never believed them.
I am not making this world for money. I want to make this world because I love it. I am very passionate about my fantasy world.
And very defensive.
In the year 2015, I was noticed by a bully-ish organization formerly known as Kiwifar.ms, who mixed me up with a person of the same name in Illinois, who was a pedophile. I almost committed suicide, as they thought my creations were disgusting. What was going through my head at that point was: "They think my world is about sex." "They think my world is pure evil." "They think all bad things about my world." I was going through a rough time as well, as I was about to become homeless, packing up everything to move to a hotel because my home sold underneath me, which I was renting at the time. The thing that caught their attention was my plush Animal I wanted created, one of my creatures I designed, for therapudic purposes. During the mix up, they scoffed and rebuked it, saying that it was a "Sex Toy". I regard that specific creature almost "sacred", as it's nature is pure like a unicorn. I couldn't express myself well then, so I tried to feign my Appearance. It didn't go down very well. However, it was resolved in the end, the people were asked to stop talking about me, and left me alone.
Since then, I have learned so much. I have become nearly self-sufficient, self sustaining. I have stopped relying on others to do my chores for me, and have been doing it actually for them. I have kept complaining to a minimum, outburst almost non-existant.
You may be wondering: Why is that relevant?
I am a disabled adult with asperger's syndrome, known now as Autism spectrum (forgot the level). I had mild bipolar tendancies and schizophrenia. I am very smart with computer, but somewhat socially inept. It's been a struggle for me throughout my entire life, trying to realize my dream while making bare bones off of social security, enough to pay an extra 50 dollars to an artist every month for 1 picture.
I could continue down this path, paying an artist 1 picture every month, but this will not win brownie points and features on Line! Webtoons.
In order to stand out on Line! Webtoons and become a featured program, with the chance at a partnership, I would have to: 1) create updates every week, at least 1 webtoon per week. 2) have an artist with outstanding quality of design 3) have a bank account or something like that.
I just set up my first bank account, but I did it discretely. I am worried that I risked too much doing so, that I have overwrote and nullified the bank that my social security was set up under. So far, no phone calls from my representative payee, but we'll see.
I am sacrificing so much to make this a reality. I am mentally unready to work, I just got done with janitorial work with a job evaluation at vocational rehabilitation, which I passed with flying colors, but boy, was I pushing myself. I have decided to never do that kind of job full blown again, even part-time (which is what I was working under).
I am willing to work other jobs, though, but the jobs I'm after are not available in my area. These include: Clerk/Cashier (not at a fast food restaurant or general grocery store), Event Hoster, Toy store clerk/sorter, game store clerk/sorter, among other related things.
I have so little potential in the working industry. Yeah, it might sound like I'm undershooting myself, but it's the truth. I have OCD, a particular type that makes me cringe, complain, and avoid "dirty" things, making it hard for me to:
1). Find a home with my cleanliness requirements, especially in the bathroom.
2). Work at a job where these "dirty" things are present.
3) clean this kind of stuff, especially when it's stains or scratches/scuffs.
I don't believe in religion, so I don't think heaven or hell exists really. I have no where to look forward to. The only thing that keeps me propelling forward is the "chance" that my dream will come true. Otherwise, this is where my story ends.
"All my work to the future of Utopia" - Self-Made Quote
Sincerely,
Brandon Thomason